Twin-Fantasy

Posted by izaafaisal (122 days ago)

Hi i am a mother of a 2yr old boy and now thinking of having the next one. I have alwaysssss fancied having twins but considering my family background with no twins at all i think it'll be impossible to conceive them naturally.
Can anyone advice if i can get those fertility things to increase my chances of having twins....???? i basically have no idea how the fertility thing works, where and for how much ($) can i get it and even if im eligible for it or not, so any advice/suggestion would be reallly appreciated.
thanks a million....!!!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

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Posted by cara (122 days ago)

i had my second when my first was exactly 2 years old (there is only 6 days between their birthdays).

i have a history of twins in my family. my mother is a twin, and out of 11 cousins on my mother's side, 6 of my cousins are twins. i actually have an uncle with 2 sets of twin boys! (thank god they were 18 years apart!)

i always thought i wanted twins, but now, with my two kids, i'm very glad my second wasn't a twin. her personality is much more challenging than my older one and it would have been very difficult if she had been a twin.

however, i REALLY want to have another, i'm just a little scared that it will be twins, then we'll have 4 kids and i only ever really wanted 3....

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by izaafaisal (122 days ago)

hey cara....thanks for your msg...
wish i had a family history as yours just to promote my chances.....!
i know its not gonna be easy tackling the twins as i already have tough time with my 2yr old but i cant seem to let go of my crazy fantasy.....hopefully someone would be able to help me.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by kiwimmc (122 days ago)

I would suggest you discuss with your doctor - none of us here is able to comment on whether fertility treatment is right for your medical history. One thing to consider is that fertility treatment is usually expensive and time consuming but you may still only get a single baby. You might want to question if you are willing to go thru a potentially invasive process but still not get what you dream of. If you want to find out more on the various fertility options then you can simply search on the web - there is a lot of info out there on something like webmd.com etc but you would have to speak to someone locally to find out costings or maybe there are already comments on this website.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Sashimi Girl (122 days ago)

really? is there an ethical issue here? i don't know... just wondering. i wouldn't mind a set of twins myself. made naturally!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Begona (121 days ago)

As a twin myself, I am very curious as to why anyone would choose to have them!! Growing up as a twin was a complete pain at times, constantly answering "which one are you?" and people treating us as one person rather than two very different individuals - joint birthday gifts, constant comparisons, etc. I am TTC but am keeping fingers crossed that it is not going to be twins, but as we have lots of twins in the family it would be just my luck ha ha. I am curious - what is it exactly that appeals to people about twins? The "instant family" or the cute factor or what? :-)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by cara (121 days ago)

i'm guessing you are an identical twin, excuse the phrase, but a complete freak of nature (not you personally, but the embryo splitting). whereas fraternals are no more than siblings sharing a womb.
there is nothing you can do to "promote" having identical twins. however, if you have a history of fraternal twins (as i have) it drastically increases your odds. if i remember correctly, a natural conception of twins happens 1:80. if you have a history of twins your odds increas to 1:20. (i could have my numbers wrong, though).

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sarah jane jj (119 days ago)

Speaking with having 2 sets of twins is certainely no fantasy,nice for people to smile at ,behind the scenes is another story.....I can get to our local hospital in under 10 mins.Now the boys are getting older their personalities are shining through,youngest are 2 oldest will be 4 in November.Its a joy to watch them play together and upsetting when they fight.Your chances are higher with family history and age,has your getting older you release more eggs towards the demise of your reproductive cycle and if you have had singleton births.I have a boy 15.8 years and a girl 11.4years.I'm an only child myself,my maternal Grandadfather was a twin with 2 more sets of twins and 7 singletons brothers and sisters,I guess I would have had more but sent Hubby for snip the latter 4 not planned (with new Hubby)and was still breastfeeding when fell pregnant with latter2.If it was going to happen it would have to be me!Good luck in your quest, and on the odd occassion (usually at Disney)if you see a Western woman with4 small boys in tow its me.Usually having her caffine fix:)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by cara (119 days ago)

wow... never met someone else that had two sets!!!! you must have your hands full! (do you have a helper??? i hope so!)

amazing!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sarah jane jj (119 days ago)

We have 2 helpers but still manic :)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by izaafaisal (118 days ago)

i didnt know the cons i just went for the fantasy.....its good to hear so many different stories though many trying to frighten me but amazingly the fantasy is still there.......so keep your thoughts and opinions coming.........thanks to you all!!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (117 days ago)

Hi, I'm undergoing fertility treatments and yes, with treatments twins are possible. In fact, even taking a simple fertility drugs like Clomid, you have a chance. Clomid is taken over 5 days (just one pill a day) and it can cause multiple eggs to mature during ovulation thereby increasing your chances of having twins. Clomid is cheap, it is around 2k+.

However, here's a word of warning. Gynaes don't prescribe fertility drugs unnecessarily because of the risk of multiple births. Multiple births have a VERY high risk of premature births. Premature births can cause lots of problems due to organse being underdeveloped - some possible problems include lung problems, brain damage, kidney problems etc etc. All depend on WHEN they are born. Premature births before 36 weeks, on average require longer hospital stays - ranging from one extra week to 3 months under intensive care unit. It's very expensive for the doctors and heartbreaking for the mothers.

Not accusing you or anything, because I used to fantasize about that too - one labour and I'm done!

But my baby was born prematurely at 33 weeks so that changed my view A LOT. I was lucky that she was really healthy... but I've met other mothers who suffered... and even I went through a 2 year depression caused by guilt and constant worrying.

With my fertility treatment, there is a chance of twins... but if I could choose, one would be enough ;-)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by cara (117 days ago)

i dont' think that anyone was trying to scare you... it's just that life is never like the fantasy that you imagined and you should know what it will really be like.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by izaafaisal (113 days ago)

MayC
thanks for your thoughts.....good luck for your fertility treatment...wat sort are you taking by the way? and from who? can u recomend the doctor and how much does it cost?
I understand y gynaes wont recomend fertility drugs but if i cant have twins naturaly y cant i get help....right? And do you (or anyone) knows much about that drug 'Clomid' much? is it reliable/good?

Cara
i'm not getting scared but all these views are actually helping me realize and accept the reality....!!!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by ldsllvn (113 days ago)

i have identical twins (which indeed as Cara says is a freak of nature, nobody know what causes it - we certainly did not see it coming!). anyway - I could not deal with the idea when we were told first time that we are having twins, now, of course, i would not have it any other way. They are starting to play together and entertain each other, same age, same interest, works out great.

In HK twins club we do an adult twins lunch once a year where adult twins talk about their experience of growing up as a twin - and apart from one, everyone else LOVED it! Their relationship is so speacial with their twin, it is quite amazing really...

And as for 2 sets of twins, honestly, I cant imagine! but SaraJane is the 3rd person I have come across in HK with 2 sets of twins! More common than you think!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by abitnaive (112 days ago)

hi izaafaisal
would you be willing to share a bit about your fantasy?

what about having twins appeals to you?

if you would rather, you can pm me your answers.
i have multiples and would be happy to share my reality, i just need to get your perspective.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by ldsllvn (109 days ago)

Hi abitnaive!! good to hear from you! you are right - none of us actually mentioned what bloody hard work it actually is!!! :)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by TMP (105 days ago)

Hi there,
I have 8 month old identical twin boys (and a 2 year old boy too!) and had no fertility treatment and twins (until now of course) did not run in my family. Your chances of having twins does increase with age especially if you are a tall, caucasian woman (don't ask me why??). 3 under 2 is hard work particulary as my oldest is extremely jealous that HIS mummy spends time with his brothers! And it's never easy when they all want your attention and you only have one pair of hands! That said it is exremely rewarding as time goes on and quite wonderful to see their own unique personalities shine through. I'm an older mum and to have two babies in one go was great as I now have the family unit I wanted without having to endure another pregnancy (I suffered with debillitating morning sickness which was no fun at all!) With best wishes TMP

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by cara (105 days ago)

identical twins DO NOT run in families. fraternal twins can.
PS> that was why i was hoping for twins...get it all over with at once! now, i'm trying to convince hubby to go for #3...but he's scared that we'll have twins this time round, making it #3 & #4!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by ldsllvn (102 days ago)

it is indeed hard work but I always thought about it this way:

- 2 kids in on pregancy - done!
- all difficult bits like lack of sleep, weaning, potty training etc, etc - in one go!
- and then they always have a friend to play with!

fantastic!

(I am based in Hong Kong)